when ure gone

if, for one day, i choose to give up and get the hell outta your life, it is through no fault of mine.

seriously, appreciate. before it's too late.

on totally different note.... i hope something good will come outta this! ((: hehe. lalala!

ok gotta go prepare somemore for my presentation tmr. hopes we'll do well.

one six zero six

one six zero six. )):

morning. just returned home after visiting aj and the teachers, so im feelin abit complicated now. a mixture of nostalgia and i duno what. haha. everyone looks and sounds the same, but the sad thing is noone i asked could make it back to aj! AHHH.. stupid school and army. maybe i should organise an outing.. i think im the only class leader who hasnt done so.

anw i almost couldnt find anyone to go back with me, so i almost didnt go back. but good thing yuanting could come along! yay.. although, she's super drained from clubbing. hahha. and oh yes, thankfully i woke up in time. still cant fathom why my phone mysteriously ran out of batt tho i charged it last night!!! omg. and to think i was about to boast to mr zhuang bout my phone's good batt life. seriously, i have no idea why it went flat. maybe its time for a new phone. ((:

uhhh so anw, bought ferrero rocher for ms ma. HAHA. wanted to get her merci but cheers was too... ahem. lol. almost didnt get anything, but i think that would be quite donkz. she's still the same. super hilarious. brought us to the staffroom and i found out she received MANY chocolates. haha! then i told her not to zhuan3 song4 the gift to others cus yt commented bout the choc wrappers in her bin and she said it wasnt her who ate it. hees. should have told her not to share as well. oops. oh oh and then very randomly, she fished out our class photo!! haha, she seems so happy tho. and my hair in j1 was really............ haha. i think tash would be laughing again.

and then we met mr toh and mr lau. haha. think ive exchanged more words with toh today compared to my entire year in jc luh. i miss his class, esp when he just starts chatting with us. but i still feel quite bad stoning in his lessons all the time tho. hees. and mr lau.. still the same. he thought we were from the 04 batch. LOL. but he says he still rmb us. yay..

hmmm so after that went for lunch with yt. so fun!! its been really long since i had a chat with anyone from sixteen. so yup. we had a feast. haha. was supposed to eat something healthy but ended up eating oily stuff like prata. and the ovatine godzilla thing is damn cheat money. rahhh. yupyup. so i caught up with her busy and happening life and i realised that everyone is leading such fun filled lives except for me! hmph. nvm... slow and steady. heh.

yawns.. omg i think this entry sounds so grammatically wrong. but im too tired to edit or think of better sounding phrases. another time ba. sleep deprived. thinks i shall go take a nap or sth. hopes to meet up with more people soon.. oh yeah i got the pics for the cac camp alr. quite awhile back actually. but really lazy to post those pics. hang in there ya, i'll find the energy to put life back to my blog someday..

nigghttts all. i miss aj!

olympics 08

haha. omg i survived the hectic week! gosh, actually it wasnt so bad in the end. expected to just die flat due to overwhelming workload and seemingly unprogressive projects, but everything just fell into place somehow. am really thankful for that. cant believe i managed to slack quite alot. so right now im feeling kinda happy. but really sleepy on the other hand. PSASD at work. hahaha.

worked on my ob&d proj early in the mornin at ps today.. hahha. im really really impressed! ive never gotten so much done within 2h before luh, kudos to my teammates. hees. very very glad. mm, and found out that its the fireworks festival ytd and today. didnt manage to go somehow.

anw, been enjoying the final few events of olympics these few days. super entertaining!! had a supposed study session ytd but halfway thru zk suggested watching olympics. hahaha, guess he's been studying real hard these days, prelims is next week. haha. pretty confident about gp aye?? jiayou all! tsktsk, i seriously think he is easily distracted by the tv. maybe next time we should go back to macs or sth to study. hmm.

but anw, we ended up camping in front of the tv for about 3hrs watching the track and field events and basketball. it was super hilarious cus the athlete's name was seriously unbelieveable. we were watching this guy called hooker (omg, heng he's not a girl, but it's still quite unfortunate..) jumping the pole vault thingy. he was really good, but i supported the other guy who lost, so sad. zk supported hooker.. not surprisingly. haha! and we watched usain bolt being such an arrogant guy once again. zzz. but he's super fast. and tall.

today there was another guy with a rather debate-able name - Jesus Espana from spain. hee. he even has his country incoporated into his name. too bad his name did not give him any god-ly powers cus he ended up 2nd last. lol.. tmr i should watch again. tho it's the last day alr.. sad. damn jealous of jiao lian who went to watch the olympics!! gahh.. i shall aspire to earn enough to catch london 2012. (:

okok i'd better sleep soon, gotta work in the morn again. zz. nights.

hehe. hopes to keep the sms-es going. interesting!! ((:

blogging from toshiba

hola all.. finally had the time to visit this blog of mine. hmm, ok actually im not as busy as i sound but yeah, it's been quite a hectic week. realised its so difficult to juggle work and school. so im giving up my weekday p2 class. abit sad cus of the income loss and all, but well, opportunity costs! yawns..

oh oh, almost forgot, well im sure ive boasted to many people alr, but.... *drumrolls* i got me a new laptop! hahah.. well the design's awesome and it's my first time owning one, so it's quite exciting. yeah, so sua ku, but haiya, it feels darn nice to work with a functional computer. my desktop is really CMI luh. slowly on its way to hell alr. *kicks it repeatedly* hmm, i shall shower love to this new laptop here tho i forsee it wouldnt last.. hahaha. it'd better not give me probs man, considering it's close to 2000bucks.

so anw, just popping by to announce that im still alive (maybe to some's disappointment lol). dun really have any exciting stuff to say cus i havent gotten any opportunities to go out except that one fri afternoon with zk. uhh, actually more like studied out. haha. so sad i can no longer solve jc math qsns ): watched money no enough which i found quite exaggerating, but still rather intriguing. esp the part where they had to choose between mother and daughter. how can anyone bring themselves to make this kinda decision..

hmm, thinks i'll have to get back to work soon. tutorials and projects are really piling up, and it doesnt help that i dun understand a single concept covered in lectures. gahhh, gotta waste time reading the stupid notes which are so brief.. ugh. uni is such a chore.. hmm anw my purpose of blogging today is truly to say that i reaaaaally miss my pw group. we may not be the best group ability wise but i would think that we are arguably the group with the best teamwork. still rmb how we tried our best to help one another in order to produce top quality results. hees. sound so proud. but i certainly learnt alot from them, dun think i would have managed my presentation if not for their patience and feedbacks. ahhhh... how i wish uni pw groupmates are like that too, but i guess its quite alot to ask for...

okay shall go back to stats now, i have no idea what the textbook is saying. this week's gonna be quite packed again! with last min studying and tutorial doing as well as interviews to go for.. gahhh. monday blues. nights all

breathing

I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be
--

shoulder's still aching a little despite me going to the chi medicine place for treatment today. tho i'd have to say the massage made it abit better.. hmm, what i need is a good shoulder rub. but well, guess we'll just have to wait and see how the medicine holds up.

well, anw, this week has been quite bad, the only cheerful thing that's happened is probably the fact that i've finally had the opportunity to chat with sis. albeit mostly on the topic of school. it's been so long since i've exchanged so many words with her. it's part of growing up i suppose, as we age, our time will inevitably be devoted to different people. but in any case, am still really glad to have spoken with her.

sigh so bored. im beginning to question why on earth i started this post. okay shall go soon. tmr's ayden's gathering! hopes it'll be fun.. tho ktv-ing isnt really my cup of tea. lol, i think i'll just go "huh" and start stoning while everyone else sings the latest chi songs. what a surprise kit doesnt listen to chi songs... or any songs that are recent for that matter. i can only manage oldies.. guess zk is right when he said im auntie. lol. cant imagine myself singing in front of people either. heh! what to do, such a nice voice like mine (ahem) is only meant for my ears, and perhaps the things in the bathroom. ok we shall see how it goes tmr.. for all you know i might get high. haha..

yawns, i know im not producing the most interesting blog entries of late but heaven isnt helping me, what to do.. school is a total bore. i lost count on the number of times i drifted off to my own little world during the lectures. especially econs and stats. it's so.. challenging to stay focused with them droning on in such monotonous voices. kinda sad that the only time the econs lecturer managed to get any attention was when she made stupid comments about the microphone. haha but the seats are quite comfy.. (:

anw, just wanted to say that i miss all of my jc friends whom i cant seem to meet up with. netballers, 1606 (and my pw group!!!)... everyone. mm, and also not forgetting the lil ones who are still preparing for their As. zk and of coursee TASH! haha. anw, not sure if u'll be reading.. hmmm.. do tag if u are k. aaand take care of urself yea! gosh, saying these out loud makes me miss em all even more.): and oops, realised i dont really know many juniors. tsktsk. bet someone will think im hostile again..

ohwell, reminisce another day. shall go now. nights all.

last day of vacation

(edited)

i have no idea why im feelin so terrible now. mood's going down exponentially. shouldnt have worked so much today i guess... come to think of it i worked 9 to 5 today. came home feelin so damn grouchy. so sorry to anyone who msged me today and got curt replies. i really am not feeling the best.

welllllllll 've had better days.

if only i could pour everything out like i am so tempted to. but knowing that you might chance upon this makes it so difficult to do so. i wish i dun have to always feel like i'm the only one who cares, and being so desperate to make things right.

i need reassurance. because now, it just feels like everything ended the moment this year started. call me sensitive or needy if you must........... but thats how it seems to me. and whats so hurtful is that it almost seems as though you prioritise everything and everyone else way before me. considering everything i've done, putting myself on the line like that and then feeling like a fool. i duno, it's not the best feeling yeah?

sometimes, i'd need you to listen. and to care. cus a lil bit of concern once in awhile wont take too much outta ya, would it?